By Teresa Hicks

From disrupted routines to sensory overload, even holiday traditions can bring confusion and distress for those living with dementia. Dementia refers to a group of conditions caused by abnormal brain changes that damage brain cells, leading to progressive loss of cognitive function. These changes can interfere with memory, communication and behavior, often altering daily life and relationships.

To help families navigate these challenges, Rita Jablonski, PhD, CRNP, FGSA, FAAN, Professor at the University of Alabama at Birmingham School of Nursing and an expert in dementia care, shares practical ways to preserve holiday joy while supporting the comfort of loved ones.

Reducing holiday stress

The holiday season can be overwhelming for those living with dementia. All forms of dementia involve the progressive loss of brain cells, but what differentiates each type is how those cells are damaged, according to Jablonski.

“As people lose brain cells, they are less able to filter out noise and activity, with sights and sounds bombarding their senses and resulting in feelings of overwhelm and irritability,” Jablonski said. “This is why a person living with dementia may want to leave an event within minutes of arriving.”

However, families can help reduce stress by reimagining holiday gatherings.

“If attending a large holiday party, ask the host if there is a quiet area where the person living with dementia may sit with one or two people, away from the noise and chaos,” she added. “Another option is to bring the party to them in the form of shorter, smaller gatherings.”

Taking these steps can help make holiday events more comfortable and enjoyable for everyone involved.

Communicating effectively

Clear and simple communication is essential during holiday activities, as people living with dementia may struggle to understand long or complex sentences.

Jablonski emphasizes the importance of speaking in short, direct statements and allowing time for the person to respond.

“For example, instead of saying, ‘Before handing me your coat, give me your scarf,’ say, ‘Please give me your scarf,’ pause, and then say, ‘Please give me your coat,’” she said. “This approach not only reduces confusion but also helps the person feel more in control of simple tasks, making these interactions less stressful.”

Decision-making can also become challenging, particularly when faced with many options.

“Caregivers can help by simplifying options, asking questions like ‘Biscuit or crescent roll?’ or ‘Coffee or tea?’,” Jablonski said. “When you know your loved one’s preferences, focus on those and skip the rest: ‘Look, Mom, there is fried shrimp and coleslaw, your favorites!’”

In addition, memory lapses can create anxiety, especially around names or less familiar relatives.

“Many people living with dementia are aware of their memory problems and become nervous about making mistakes,” Jablonski said. “Relatives and friends, especially those who interact sporadically with the person living with dementia, should introduce themselves and even add some context, such as ‘Hi, I’m Maya. I’m married to your nephew, David.”

Small steps like this will help your loved ones feel comfortable and supported throughout holiday celebrations.

Maintaining routines and increasing participation

For those with dementia, maintaining consistent routines is essential during the holiday season.

“It’s important to keep regular wake-up and bedtimes and stick to familiar mealtimes, especially if medications need to be taken with food,” Jablonski said. “If your loved one attends a day program or respite care that remains open during the holidays, continuing attendance can provide stability and a sense of normalcy.”

Families can also help loved ones participate in holiday activities without them becoming overwhelmed.

“Many celebrations include religious services or community events, which can be crowded or lengthy,” she said. “Choosing shorter, less crowded services, such as an earlier Christmas Day service instead of a busy Christmas Eve program, can make participation more manageable.”

Even with these precautions, overstimulation can occur, so family and caregivers should have an exit strategy planned.

“For example, families may choose to travel in separate vehicles, allowing some members to remain at an event while others take the person with dementia home if needed.”

By preparing in advance, families can reduce stress and create a more comfortable holiday experience for their loved one.

Resources and thoughtful gift ideas

Practical, meaningful gifts can make a difference for the person living with dementia.

“Traditional gift items like ‘Best Grandma’ coffee mugs, cologne or bathrobes may not be as helpful,” Jablonski said. “Consider gift cards for meal delivery services such as DoorDash or grocery delivery services like Instacart. These can save time and reduce stress for caregivers who cannot leave their loved one unattended.”

Another gift option is a creating a custom coupon book.

“This can include gestures such as ‘take Dad on an outing’ or ‘stay with Aunt Carol when needed,’ giving caregivers valuable time for appointments, rest or personal recharge,” she said. “Thoughtful gifts like these help families navigate the holidays with more ease.”

Families caring for someone with dementia also have access to helpful resources and support.

The Area Agencies on Aging, which can be reached at 1-800-AGE-LINE, offer information on caregiving programs, services and other community support systems to assist families throughout the holiday season.